29/8/2009- Helix Pierced

Entering spring.
It's a beautiful day out there, the warmth of the sun is pleasant, the air is fresh and the flowers are bright with colour.
It's windier than usual, I like the wind, it runs through my hair, I feel freed.
I'm planning on doing some shopping with Olivia today and also getting my Tragus pierced. Hope parents won't mind.

Here we are, at the crowded shopping centre, nothing new yet. Come on- bring on the spring fashion!!!
I wonder how my spring trend is going to look like, when I set it up. I say bright colours, with my favourite colour red.
Something pretty, something fresh.
I want those red love heart glasses, their fresh.
Too bad I can't find them here, in OMD.

Anyways. I spent my money on a beautiful scarf, it has roses on it, it's pretty and also I bought lots and lots of lollies, chocolates and sugar stuff. Sugar's yummy.

Piercing. I wanted my tragus pierced, but stupid law said that I had to have a parent with me and no way in the world my parents would let me pierce my tragus.Olivia wanted her Helix pierced, good thing a friend of ours worked there, at that store and she pierced it for her.Since I wasn't allowed to get my tragus pierced, I rang up my mother and asked her if I could get my Helix. She said no at first, but then she agreed.
Click. And Yaayyyy I finally got my third piercing. It has a beautiful, sky blue diamond on it, based on my birth stone. Oh and I'm still getting my tragus pierced later, when I'm 16.

So yeah spring does bring happiness to the world.

Warning

I'm not here to satisfy you.
I will not be able to excite you anymore.
This is not for someone, it's for everyone.
I just got my happiness back and no I'm not willing to loose it again.
I'm not going to let any asshole come and take it away from me.
I may seem as a nice person and trust me I am.
But however I can make your nightmares come true.
I can be selfish.
If you're coming into my life for no reason or you just want to play around with my feelings, then I would suggest that you should change your mind.
Just a warning.

Silver-

I don't intend to write alot of things on here.
I've been too busy doing other things than using the net.

All I want to say is that I trully miss you Staphroula, Silver Staphroula, My Best Friend.
I have never forgoten you and I never will.
Even if it seems that we are worlds apart, you are always a beautiful memory to me, I treasure and protect.
I still remember, before we got torn apart, that we made a promise, a promise that would be kept and never forgoten. That promise was that we would always stay best friends, not matter what, and we even signed BFF "Best Friends Forever" on a blank piece of white paper with 2 little bears holding flowers next to it.
I never said a proper goodbye.
I miss you and I love you.
You will always be my Best Friend Forever-BFF.

x.

WTH!!!!

When Im supposed to feel broken, smashed, pulled, pushed, depressed, worthless.
I feel relieved.
I feel happy.
It's either how I trully feel or my mind is playing tricks on me.
I had no hope in nothing and to be honest I wasn't waiting for something amazing to happen.
I just let the waive take me wherever it desired.
Everything's still there, just not the pain.
Is it going to come back? Or has it left once and for all?

Nightmare

I'm trying so hard to be happy again.
It seems impossible. My happiness does not seem to return.
I chase it, I catch it and then I just let it slip through my fingers.
I don't even know how it happened, one flash and it was taken away from me.
My thinking is constant. I'm thinking so much about things.
My concentration is indescribable. I focus so hard on things, even unimportant things.
I want those to stop.
I want to pause my life so I can finally clear my head.
Everything seems so dull, so confusing, so insecure.
It feels like when you're in a dream.
You're running and you're chocking for breath.
You're running, but no matter how hard you try, you just can't run fast enough.
You can't move your legs, they feel heavy. You're whole body feels heavy it doesn't seem to respond to you.
This is not a dream, it’s a terrifying nightmare.
I want to wake up.
But can I?

Emotion

“When sadness comes, just sit by the side and look at it and say,I am the watcher, I am not sadness,” and see the difference. Immediately you have cut the very root of sadness. It is no more nourished. It will die of starvation. We feed these emotions by being identified with them.”

Pieces

Meh i’m tired.

I thought i should come here and write some things down so they can stay out of my head.I’m annnoyed at some people.I can’t sleep much at night, it’s annoying.I’m never fully sutisfied.And i’m still running to get to the other side.

x.