Selfish

When are you ever going to learn that the world doesn't revolve around your finger?
To me you are stupid. I find you in places where you don't belong.
Where can you belong in my life?. I can't make a choice for you, that choice has already been made and it wasn't by me. If I had a choice it would of been different.
You're worthless, not good enough to waste my time on.
We are close, I would do anything for you, but all you do is fuck me over.
I keep trying, trying my hardest to show you that this is not how I ever wanted you to treat me, that you're not doing anything good for me, that you're hurting me, that you're making me Hate You.
Hatred is not a good choice between us. You are the force that is pushing us apart, away from our friendship, away from our trust.
It seems like you couldn't care less about our friendship, that this is nothing and you wouldn't give a f*** if anything happened to it.
Like those wonderful days and nights where our stomachs ached from laughter, where the only thing we could do was run, run freely, brushing our hands though those colourful flowers meant nothing.
I don't want to lose our friendship. I don't want to lose you. You have a part in my life and I don't want to put you out of it.
I can't put you out of it. You are family.
Although to you it could be nothing, I could be nothing.
Everything about you is careless, Of course why would you care? The only thing you truly care about is yourself. Everything is about you.
Don't try denying it, it will only show the effect it has on you and the anger it's caused you, it would only make it worse. I know you pretty well to judge or else I wouldn't bother. You can't prove me wrong, no one can.
If you can and think that our friendship is something and it will last, Then I would suggest change, because change is what you clearly need now, a change that would bring the laughter back, the happiness, the immortality of our friendship.
The change that would prevent the hatred I'm developing for you.

x.

Please don't mind me crawling on your back.

I'm trying to look for a way to start this but all I can say is that I am truly happy.
Everything's pretty much returning to the way I wanted it to be.
Things are looking up. Finally.
You're gone, the past has gone and I know that I will not miss any of it because I know that I'm better off without it..

Holidays are in 2 weeks time. I want to leave this horible place. I want to go on a holiday, somewhere beautiful, somewhere amazing, somewhere where it has the most beautiful sunsets ever. Queensland-Gold Coast, Yes I want to go there so badly this summer.
Hopefully I'll go, unless something stupid happens that would ruin everything. That's when I'll be really pissed.

I'm also excited for Christmas, Yes, presents, Santa, Colourful lights on trees etc,etc. Im having a photoshoot with the most wondeful photographer:D Franchesca, Soo excited.
I want my tragus to heal before Christmas, it's infected lol.
Anyways I'm off to beach:D WOOOO!!!

x.